Orlando, FL - Here amidst the sweltering lizards and blistering roaches, The AI announces the pairings for this year's Four Ball match. The Greatest Living 4-Ball Champion in AI history, Gordon, and his astounding 12-3-2 record will be paired this year with the event's least accomplished competitor, Heimsch (2-8-2) whose only two victories have come, unsurprisingly, when paired with Gordon. As a team, Gordon & Heimsch are 2-2. They will face the unit of Paze (3-5-1) & Burke (8-7-3) who are an equally pedestrian 1-1 as a team.
Where: The 'regrassing' (a term borrowed from The Apartment) project currently underway at Bay Hill has thrown the AI Planning Committee into a tizzy of regrouping, reorganizing and the usual regretting. The result? The AI-XIX Four-Ball Championship will be held on the Charger at Bay Hill. The 'front' nine will be contested from the Blue tees and the 'back' nine from the yellows.
With the 'big' course closed, the AI will have something approaching carte blanche (that's French for white golf cart) on the Charger for both the 4-Ball and LOS, should anyone still be breathing after the sweat box effect of 18 holes in Orlando in late June.
More. After a long winter of negotiations marked by periods of optimism interspersed with ennui, The AI can now officially announce that the champion of AI-X, James "Reef" Reifsnyder will be returning to the field of play for the first time since his 'retirement' halfway through the final round of AI-XIV. As if that were not enough to stoke the fires of the AI's cadre of rabid fans, he will be joined on the grassy knolls and sandy divots by The Banquet Director, expanding her reach from the past two LOS contests.
One might ask, a la David Byrne: "how will we work this?"
At the suggestion of the returning Reef, we will add him to one twosome and the BD to the other and play as two groups of three [threesomes just didn't sit well in the initial draft]. The match will still be between the twosomes mentioned above. That they will be playing in different groups presents some measure of difficulty in tracking the progress of said match. The AI Logistics & Format Committee is working as we speak to divine how best to stage the Championship.
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